I used eharmony for about six months. In some ways, I thought it was a good site. In other ways, I didn't like it.

I never actually met anyone while a member. I did get tons of matches, and I even got a few (temporary) email pen pals out of it, but I never met that special someone. Oh well. I can't moan too much about that. Regardless of how well-designed the site is, it isn't going to work for everyone.

First, I'll discuss the things I liked about eharmony. I liked the "privacy." I used the word privacy in quotation marks due to the old adage that there is no actual privacy on the Web. But I digress. I liked that not just anyone could look me up and view my profile and picture. Only people that had been deemed compatible with me could see me. That was nice. I also liked the personality test I had to take. It was pretty lengthy, but I liked the synopsis that it gave about me and my potential mate. In fact, I still like reading through that thing from time to time.

Most of the things that I didn't like have to do with the fact that people are involved, and when you have people, you have static. I did get a little irked when I found that most of my matches either didn't respond to me or closed me out. I know it's important to be thick-skinned about these things, but it can get disheartening to constantly get ignored or closed out because your match "doesn't feel that the chemistry is there." Some people may criticize me for it, but my self-esteem did take a few blows while I was at eharmony. However, when I get rid of the emotions and look at it objectively, I realize that this is inevitable. As much as we all complain about superficiality, most of us are, indeed, superficial. Let's face it, most people want a significant other that our friends will covet us for having.

I do have one little issue with the site. When I completed that personality test, it gave me an overview of the overall personality of my ideal match. In short, my ideal match was supposed to be a mild-mannered intellectual who is a little bit on the introverted side, and who "likes to look good, but doesn't obsess about it." However, many of my matches were nothing like this. In fact, a good number of the women I was matched with described themselves as very outgoing and prone to enjoying frequent social events such as parties. Also, in response to the question about how many books they've read, several of my matches responded with things like "I don't really read...hehehe." When I read their profiles, I just kind of sat back and thought, "Gee, this doesn't sound too much like my ideal match." Of course, I still requested communication with them, because I think it's important to keep an open mind about these things and not snub people just because they don't initially seem like your "type."

That pretty much sums up my experiences at eharmony. In closing, I'll answer one more question.

Would I recommend eharmony to anyone else?

Well, I did learn a little about myself while I was there, and ultimately, I think my skin is a little thicker now. If you want to try it, go ahead. But bear in mind, in online dating, your appearance is going to play a vital part in whether or not people accept you. Make sure you put up a really good, recent picture of yourself. You may want to go as far as having a professional picture taken.

Before I close, I'll make one more comment about appearances at eharmony and other dating sites: If you don't look like you could be a model for Calvin Klein or Abercrombie, then don't get your hopes up too high if you decide to try any of them.