Post-divorce I was miserable and took a break from dating. After a while, I joined eharmony, match and yahoo. Of the three, only eharmony sent me a good number of matches --- especially at first. (Was this because the other sites have 3x more men than women on them? Or because they cater to younger aged people?)

Anyway, I started dating and met some nice women. It was better than staying home! Most were one date only as these are, after all, blind dates. A few I dated three or four times. If they were only interested in a companion/friend or free meal I looked elsewhere.

About four months in I met someone I liked. We had that elusive chemistry. It lasted about four months. Luckliy, I met someone right after that. This relationship was even better and lasted about seven months. So, I can't complain too much.

But it's not perfect. Meeting someone "special" is a lot of work. And eharmony is not cheap. Moreover, people who have quit are still listed as matches! Distance is sometimes an issue, too. Matches on the site are nice in person (usually) but seem somewhat picky --- too many do not respond at all --- maybe they are single for a reason.

Now, I'm looking for more dates and another relationship. It's hard. I receive fewer matches now than when I was new to eharmony. Many women seem very busy (with their lives, other dates?). Many women on site have young children and this makes dating difficult, if not impossible. After much recent computer work I received 5 phone numbers. One match did not like me --- I wasn't surpised given how she sounded on the phone. Another set a date and cancelled on some pretext --- no class. A third wants to meet but is so busy she is unavailable for nearly a month! I met a fourth who is waffling --- so it's not worth the time or money to meet her. The fifth seems ok and I suspect we will go on our first date. These five numbers were the result of about 75 matches over four months or so. It's work.

eharmony is not bad. Meeting people is tough (especially when one is no longer in their 20s or 30s) and blind dates are tough. It's a numbers game. The biggest issue is not related to eharmony but to the fact that internet daters are internet dates for several reasons. One is they are very busy. So dates and relationships are not necessarily their first priority as it was when they were younger. The women with children are lonely but quite rightly put their kids first. Too many are discouraged. There are reaons why these people (myself included, I guess) are internet dating rather than meeting people through friends or whatever. For me, it's much work but worth it. And eharmony, for men at least, is probably the best service out there.